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As Good as It Gets

"Not on this door ..."

 
        

''Love was ...''
Mr. Udall, I'd like to speak to you.
Let me do this by myself.
- ''Love was ...''
- Are you in there?
Pansy-assed stool-pusher!
Yes?
This can wait.
I found Verdell, Mr. Udall.
Well ... That's a load off.
Did you ... do something to him?
Do you realize
that I work at home?
Do you like being interrupted
when you're playing in your garden?
No,
I turn the ringer off on my phone.
- And put a piece of cardboard ...
- I work all the time.
So never interrupt me!
Not if you hear the sound of a thud
from my home, -
- and one week later there's a smell
from a decaying human body, -
- and you have to hold a hanky
to your face because of the stench.
Even then, don't come knocking.
Or if it's election night
and you want to celebrate, -
- because some fudge-packer was
elected the first queer president.
And he's going to have you
down to Camp David, -
- and you want someone
to share the moment with.
Even then, don't knock.
Not on this door.
Not for any reason.
Do you get me, sweetheart?
Yes. It's not a subtle point
that you are making.
Okay, then.



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